Do you remember this old Beatles' song? It went: All you need is love, na na na na na; All you need is love, na na na na; All you need is love, love; Love is all you need.

It's Valentine's Day so let's talk about love. Obviously love isn't all we need. We need food, clothing, shelter, income and a host of other things to sustain life, but once those basic needs are met, what we need most is love. 

The romantic, butterflies-in-the-stomach kind of love is grand, but we know it's not the only kind of love. Parents love their children and children their parents. Friends love one another, too. Beyond the hearts and flowers, the chocolates and the kisses, what is love really like?  

Yesterday, in preparation for writing this, I asked my husband of nearly thirty-three years what his secret was to a long marriage. As is often the case when he feels put on the spot, he turned the question back to me. What was my secret to staying married so long. After a little pondering, I replied, "Patience."  

First of all, love is patient. Be honest. When you love someone, you put up with a lot - grumpy moods, irritating habits, bad driving, weird relatives, differences in goals, and all kinds of other stuff that might drive you crazy if you didn't love that person.

Love is also kind. Kindness makes you tender-hearted, sympathetic and altruistic. It means that your intent is for the other's good.

Love is not envious or jealous. Huh? Okay, it's like this: Love is not ‘all about me'. It's all about the other person. Love is also not boastful or arrogant, disdainful or condescending, nor does it insist on its own rights. Ouch! But isn't a love relationship about getting my own needs met? That's what we all hear from the media, the magazine articles, and the TV relationship gurus. Sorry, that's not what true love is about.

Real love is not touchy, resentful, rude, pushy, or just plain whiny. Love is just not compatible with selfish or abusive actions.

Holding grudges, keeping track of slights or wrongs, and holding on to past hurts are evidence of a life marked by lack of love. Notice that I've used the word, ‘marked'? Living without letting people off the hook marks our lives with negativity, bitterness, and unforgiveness.

Love loves it when right and truth prevail. Love can survive under the worst of times and circumstances and persists in believing the best of everyone.

And finally, love never gives up hope. When you love, you never throw in the towel when things don't work out. Love never fails. It never fails to make a positive difference wherever it is spread. Love in unconditional. If it is not unconditional, it's only a deal.  

Did you know that God is love? Not only does he love, but he is love itself. That means that he is all the characteristics of love. He is patient and kind, never envious, jealous or rude. The fact that we can go about doing our own thing with complete disregard for him is ample evidence that he does not insist on his own way.

He takes no account of the rotten things that people call him, say about him, or blaim on him. He continues to love us in spite of all that and is thrilled when good things happen to us or we make good decisions that improve our lives. God is always ready to forgive us for our blunders, to let us off the hook. He continues to believe the best of us even when we behave our worst. His love in unconditional. We don't have to act a certain way, or perform to strict standards for him to love us. Even in the face of continual rejection, he never stops loving.

So if love is all we need, that's the kind to have. It never fades away, gets old, or fizzles out. It is constant, unwavering, and limitless. When my husband had time to think about it, his answer to my question was, "selflessness". Yep, love is that, too. Happy Valentine's Day!

Love and lusciousness,

 

P.S. After months of work, my fantastic new book and course Turning on the Light - Finding your Luscious Place in the Spirit is almost ready to launch. Created from a lifetime of spiritual searching, teaching, and discovery this inspiring program will show you how to uncover your own soul purpose, how to find out what God is saying to you (it's good), how to get rid of fear, and many more luscious spiritual goodies. Stay tuned for the pre-launch announcement!

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