Today I've decided to take this video outside on my deck because it's such a beautiful summer day out. I've got these beautiful flowers in my little handing basket there. Today I'm going to talk to you about looking back. You know as creative people, we so often look back at our lives and go, "That didn't work out," or "I tried this and it just didn't happen like I expected," or "I thought I'd make money at this and I put all that time and effort into it, and it didn't work."

It can be really, really discouraging. I want to encourage you today not to look at your past like that. Just say, you know what, things happen. As creative people we always have lots of ideas. You know you're competent in what you do, but sometimes things don't work out perfectly, and sometimes through no fault of your own.

It's important to put things in context, and say, "Okay, this happened.”

• Why did it happen?
• Is there something I can change?
• Is there something I should do differently?
• Can I do it again?
• Is this the wrong timing?

Sometimes, some of the things that I have done didn’t work out well. World events affected everything, monetary exchange rates, things that I had absolutely no control over.

It's easy to say, "It was my fault. I failed again."

I want urge you not to do that, but instead look at those things in context. Say, "Okay, these are the things that happened. Why did they happen? What can I learn from it? What can I take away? What was positive?"

It is so easy to think about the negative. Oh my goodness! And we tend to go that way. As creative people, self-doubt creeps in and with it all that kind of bad stuff. Just don't go there.

Instead say, "Okay, this is what's positive that happened. This is what I learned. This is what I can take to my next project, to my art career, my writing career, whatever your creative pursuit is.” Look at it that way.

Don't dwell on it. It happened, it's behind you, move forward.

Another thought is, don't entertain those bad memories. Don't invite them in. Don't serve them tea. Don't give them space in your mind, in your heart, in your emotions. Just don't give them space.

Then when those reminders come up, switch them over. Just flip them over and say, "Yes, that happened but…this is the good part. That was then, this is now."

That's my message today. Keep it positive. Keep it forward thinking. Just keep on moving in the direction that your creative dreams are taking you, because it's important. It's important to the world that creative people keep creating. It's just how it is.

Recently, the writing world is all a-flutter with the sudden (How could it be sudden?) revelation that Huffington Post apparently requires its writers to work for free. While I have no opinion on HuffPo in particular, this scenario does bring up the unpleasant truth that creative people are asked to, and agree to, work for free far too often.

Sure, I know it happens in other occupations too, but it’s particularly rampant in the arts. The contention is that because you love what you do that should be compensation enough.

But you’ll get exposure

The carrot that’s dangled in front of our noses is, “but it will be great exposure.” As a visual artist as well as a writer, I fell for that stinker many years ago, until I wised up and realized that my work was being used and the benefit to me was zero.

People gush over talent but forget that the artist or writer is not building a career on a gift that dropped from the sky onto her head. Years of training, practice, and sacrifice have gone into developing her art. Giving it away is career madness.

For creatives, who admittedly tend to be right-brained people, demanding money for art can be difficult. Part of the reason is that we all know that while people love art they don’t want to pay for it. The same folks who ask an artist or writer to work for free wouldn’t dream of asking a dentist or car mechanic to do the same.

The other issue is that silence about money in artistic fields leaves us all at a disadvantage because we don’t know how to value our work. It takes work, time, and gumption to become intelligent in these areas and to learn how to market your own work.

Small pond, many fish

With the advent of print on demand and digital publishing, the market has been flooded with written materials that in days gone by wouldn’t have made it onto a shelf. I’m a huge fan of indie publishing but a result I’ve noticed from this influx is price competition between authors. It’s no secret that when you compete on price the winners are the buying public, not the people who produce the product and sell it. But if you keep giving the milk away, no one is going to want to pay for it.

Don’t worry; I don’t need to eat

When others consume the creative person’s work without paying, it directly affects the economy of a family. My kids aren’t going to be happy when I try to feed them “exposure” for dinner. My mortgage company won’t accept “I did it for free because I love it” in payment either.

Just stop it

So what’s a writer, artist, or musician to do? Here are some suggestions:

1. Understand your motivation. Are you building a career or is this just a hobby? If you’re doing it for fun, more power to you. If your goal is a career, read on.
2. Decide how you want your career to look. Get serious and get real about the fact that you are in business. Act accordingly.
3. Stop giving away your work. Money is the measure of value and you decide how you want to be valued. Giving it away sends the message that you don’t think that much of it either.
4. Next time someone asks you to give your work away, have an answer ready. “Not in this lifetime, dearie,” works. My go-to phrase is, “My kids/spouse/landlord is very narrow-minded about me not showing up with money.” Then follow that up with your fee schedule, which you just happen to have with you.

This isn’t just about Huffington Post exploiting writers, it’s about all creatives giving our work away for free so we can be more than the plain girl/guy at the prom “hoping someone will like me.” I learned years ago as a visual artist that benefitting someone else and hoping for “exposure” was worthless and always resulted in a net loss in time, energy, and money for me.

If all creatives stopped “giving the milk away” and stopped competing with each other on price, we would all benefit. So value your work, your skills, your talent, your hours. Charge more, demand more, and laugh when someone suggests that you do it for free.

Value is measured in money. Value yourself.

People ooh and aah over talent, but the artist, writer, or musician is not building a career on talent. Years of training, practice, and sacrifice have gone into developing their art. Giving it away is career suicide.

Do visions of the sleazy used car salesman in a gaudy plaid jacket and polyester pants leap to mind when you think of marketing?

Most creatives dream of quitting the day job and going full-time. Oh, and making boatloads of money. Rather than toil away in obscurity, clinging to fragments of that far-off dream, perhaps it’s time to:

• Take a clear-eyed look at why you are a writer or artist and how that question impacts your success
• Learn how you can most effectively find and reach your audience
• Get a sharp focus (or even a clue) on that money thing.